My Mother Talks Chicago Bears Football

 

Before the season proper begins, Mother—along with Father—took a trip to Bears training camp in Bourbonnais. This is her recap/notes about her experiences that she told me over FaceTime. She began by showing me the above image.

 

You know what this is? A souvenir program. And look. It has all the Bears in there. It's very cool. It has a lot of cool things, and all the coaches and everything. That was the lineup. But it was missing one player. I'll tell you about that later. 

 

Alright, I'm gonna start at the beginning. So, the whole town, like down the

street, had “Welcome Bears Fans, Welcome Bears Fans,” for like two or three blocks, so that was very nice. And then when we went into the school it said “Welcome Bears Fans.” So it was very nice. They had blow-up things for little kids to go on and jump and slide. They had a lot for kids. They had some freebee things that we picked up, and a little football like this big that I gave Liam [her grandson].

 

We had to wait in line probably 45 minutes, so I befriended some men that were behind us. They were from Chicago. First of all I was eavesdropping on them, and then I asked them if I could interview them for my website. They said sure. So, I have to read what they said. They said that the Bears might end up in last place. And the Packers are rated in first place. And I said, do you think that they'll get first place? And they said, “Not if we could help it.” They said the Patriots are cheaters. They're doomed. They said they're messing with the integrity of the game. Like, natural deflation is a slow leak, they said. But then another guy said, “Well, if you ain't cheatin', you ain't tryin'.” So, that was fun. 

 

The other thing was then I asked them how are the Bears going to do this year. Just the Bears. And one person who was with me said, “Just fine, maybe even good enough.” 

 

Your dad. You know his “good enough” quote. I said 8-8. Somebody said 9-7. Clear .500. “The defense is better than you thought,” they told me. “Watch out for Rivers” from San Diego. He's really good. The good teams to watch are the Colts, the Lions, and Denver. 

 

My friends that were behind me. These are still quotes from them. I'll tell you when I start a new thing. 

 

“New England is shifty, Detroit falls apart at the end of the game, Aaron Rodgers can pull a ball out of his butt.” That's what they told me.

 

Then we went in—this is the second part—and we met my little friend who was sitting next to me. He was ten years old, almost 11. I had to get some quotes from him, and he was great. He was so smart. He said that the coach, John Fox, “is better than what we had and exactly what we want.” He said, “the goal of the Bears is to make the playoffs. Not necessarily do better here, or do better there, that's their goal, to make the playoffs.” And that Fox did that with the Broncos. He said, “Although, the Bears offense cannot compare to the Broncos.” Then he told me that—this is cute—“Forte, Jeffries, Bennett are little weapons that we have.” That's a good line. “But, unlike the Broncos, we don't have any guaranteed Hall of Famers.” 

 

Then I asked him what he thought about Brady, and he said that “Brady has to take responsibility, but that it really wasn't his fault, because they should keep it legal, but they can deflate it a little.” 

 

Yup. This is the ten-year-old still. He was amazing. Then he said, “Watch the wide receivers of the Steelers.” And he said, his favorite tight end is number 88, Dante Rosario, on the Bears. Now we're done with the kid. 

 

Now I'm going to talk about specific players. Tim Jennings, number 26. Dad said he did a good job. Number 22, Forte, did well. Number 75, that's Kyle Long, that's Howie's son, so I watched him a little bit. And my guy, number four. I'm rooting for him.  

He was brand new, not even in my book. And then I tried to look it up, who's Bears number four? And I couldn't find it. So then I asked the neighbor and they said, oh, they just got him today, and his name's A.J. Cruz. So then, he is a wide receiver and a specialist. He's 5-foot-9 and he looks like a midget next to the other guys, but I think he'll be able to run between them. He played for Brown University, then he played arena football for Arizona. He's very quick and he's going to be a specialist who runs back the ball. What do you call that guy? Yeah, right. A kickoff returner. So, he looked good. He's my favorite this year on the Bears. 

 

He was getting like every pass. You'd throw it to him, and he's run for it, and get it. There are also two backup quarterbacks that I would like to mention. [laughs] One is Jimmy Clausen, number 8. You know him. Stop picking your skin. 

 

He looked good at practice and he looked good at the first preseason game. I think he should replace Cutler. The other backup was number 15, Shane Carter. He looked good too, but he's fresh out of college, he went to East Carolina University. I think he'll be a good backup quarterback. 

 

Jay Cutler...

 

[shaking her head, long pause]

 

He still has happy feet. And he's not a team player. I think it's time for him to retire and just be a coach or something. Not a team player, I mean, like, at practice they bring in different teams, you know. And then they make up teams that practice together. And whenever his team was practicing, he was on the sidelines... he wouldn't talk to any teammates. One time he talked to one teammate, but otherwise, he's always talking to the coaches. Like, buttering up the coaches. He's not taking care of the team. I don't think that's good. 

 

Daddy asked me, “Is that the coach? Is that Fox?” I said, no. You see Jay Cutler's head on his butt? Kissing his butt? No, that's not the coach!

 

Now I'm going to tell you about the practice drill. Oh, wait a minute. One more thing, getting back to the players. Robbie Gould, he missed his first field goal. He was upset. And number 80, Mark Mariani, he's a wide receiver. He's also good, and fast, and can jump over guys. I think they're probably not going to do that well this year, but I think they have a lot of potential.

 

I think they have good new people playing, and new coaches who can hopefully coach. Because when you're a coach, you can't just watch people. And I've said this since you were little. You can practice from now until Doomsday, but if you keep practicing without correcting your mistakes, all you're doing is practicing an improper play. And you can go and practice for hours. But if you don't have a coach that tells you what you're doing wrong and how to improve on that, you're not going to get anything from that. So, I'm hoping these coaches are going to be able to teach them new things and that the new guys will bring in some ability. 

 

Then I wanted to tell you what they actually go at practice, because that's interesting. They do some, like, run backwards, turn around, and catch the ball. Run backwards, turn around, catch the ball. Then it's run sideways, like a crab, and catch the ball. Run sideways, like a crab, and catch the ball. And then they do a quick step [taps the table] and catch the ball. And then they do... if they don't catch a pass, or drop it, then they have to do push-ups. Then they do, backup, turn to the side, and run down the sideline. Then they practice stripping the ball. Then they shot a ball out of a machine, and they'd have to catch it, and run into two guys in front of them, and whatever. 

 

Some guys had tights on under their uniform, and some guys didn't. Do you know why? I have no idea. Number 38, when you're watching the Bears play, his name is Adrian Amos. He had gold cleats on his shoes. I don't know if they're really made out of gold, but they're gold color. That was cool to watch. You can really spot him running. 

 

At first when we were watching the practice, I thought, this is so easy. They're not making them hard enough. They take turns, they take them out for 10 minutes, go back, come out, go back. Then finally it got to be hard. I was dying, it was like 92 degrees out. So, they are working hard. And then it was done, Cutler did some interview, and the coach did some interview, and the little kids got autographs and stuff. And that was it. 

 

It was really fun, and the price was right, because it was free. I would recommend to anyone to go. I don't know if there are any more this year, but it was a lot of fun. Especially if you have a kid. You should've gone.

 

The thing is, I'm not going to do this always. I'm not going to feel the pressure, okay? If I have thoughts on it that I think I want to share, then I'll share. [If I don't watch], then what? “Oh, they won. Oh, they lost.” No, I have to watch the game. Well, except during my football nap.